A VIEW FROM THE TERRACE
Aylesbury FC v Haringey Borough
I didn’t have to work today, but all my great plans of laying in bed and doing nothing were shattered when the missus shook me awake to tell me the fence had blown down.
The rain had been belting down for the last two days and I wondered if the match would be on.
As I trundled out to the garden all wrapped up like an Eskimo, my darling little angel (I wish she was) called out. “And don’t think your going to that football place if you don’t fix the fence.”
Why did she have to call it that football place, or that place and not Aylesbury football club?
I banged a couple of six inch nails into the fence, that would hold it at least until I got out of the house and went and got ready for football.
Before going to Haywood Way I popped into my local for a pint.
Arthur, the old boy well into his nineties and as deaf as a post, was sitting at the bar nursing his glass.
“Want a drink Arthur,” I said
“No son, I can only have a half as it plays havoc with me Tinnitus.
“Oh ok, Isn’t Tinnitus noises in your ears Arthur?” I said
“Yes son, a droning all the time, all right I’ll have a scotch.”
“I get that every time I go home and the missus starts, a bloody droning in my ears,”
Arthur was busy licking some spilled scotch off the bar.
“I’m off to Aylesbury today” I said shouting so he could hear me; we are playing Haringey. I was sure I was safe with Haringey; he couldn’t know something about every place we played.
How wrong can a man be?
“Got done in the war they did”
Bloody hell, why didn’t I just say I was going shopping.
“A lot of bombs hit Haringey and they had more than their fair share of V2’s as well.
The North Middlesex Hospital was hit with six bombs at once.”
“I bet that blew a few people out of bed,” I said.
If he had had a Roka repellent at that moment he would have used it.
“Haringey play at White Hart Lane.” I said trying to confuse him. I thought he would think we were playing Tottenham Hotspur. Wrong again.
“Yes son they are the only team that play at White Hart Lane, Tottenham play at Park Lane.”
How did he know all this stuff?
“Arsenal used to play at White Hart Lane.”
“No they didn’t, they played at Highbury.”
“No son during the war Highbury ground was closed and Tottenham let them use theirs.”
“Well I never knew that Arthur”
“Yeah and something else happened in Haringey that they called the Tottenham Outrage.”
“Oh what was that then Arthur?”
“Two armed robbers of Russian extraction held up the wages clerk of the rubber works.”
“Was that the Durex factory?” I said and was laughing so much I spilt my beer, Arthur didn’t find anything funny.
“They made their getaway via Tottenham marshes and fled across the River Lee.”
“I don’t remember anything in the paper about that Arthur.”
“Oh yeah it was big news.”
This was good stuff for a change. “What happened?”
“They had guns and killed two people and wounded fourteen trying to make their escape. One of the ones killed was only thirteen.”
“Oh my God, I’m amazed I didn’t see this on TV or the papers. Go on.”
“On the opposite bank of the river they hijacked a Corporation tramcar, hotly pursued by the police on another tram.”
“What do you mean on a bleedin tramcar, we haven’t got tramcars?”
“We did have in those days.”
“When the bloody hell did this happen?
“1909”
“Oh for Christ sake”
“The hijacked tram was stopped, but the robbers continued their flight on foot. They were eventually cornered by the police and shot themselves rather than be captured.”
I wondered if I could be shot rather than listen any more.
“Got to go Arthur see you later.” I walked out of the pub in a daze.
I got to the club and went in for a beer, there were not a lot of people about, I didn’t blame them, it takes a special kind of nutter to come out in this weather.
I went into the ground, the rain had stopped but the wind was gusting very hard and I knew it could spoil the game.
I saw Ian the secretuary coughing his guts up on the steps, but he still had a fag on.
We came out in our famous red and black and Haringey were in yellow.
We started kicking into the strong wind and I thought if we could keep them out for the first half we will be ok.
It started well and Aylesbury was doing all the attacking and seemed the better side and then it happened. With just two minutes gone a Haringey cross from the left found the Aylesbury defence wanting. Mead was miles away from his man and he easily headed the ball past the stranded Smith into the net. 0 – 1.
Aylesbury did not panic and continued with the pressure. A minute later they should have scored but the ball was just pushed past the post by the keepers fingertips.
Haringey had their chances and on ten min it took a good save by Smith to keep them out.
Although they were playing against the strong wind, it could be seen that Aylesbury were the far better team. On the half hour a pass found Henney in the area and he rounded the keeper only to have his legs taken away from him.
Henney smashed the resulting penalty into the net. 1 – 1.
Aylesbury kept up the pressure and Henney was unlucky not to score just before half time when he turned in the area and shot just wide.
The half time whistle came and I rushed into the club for a nice cold beer, I needed it, I was frozen.
With Aylesbury kicking with the wind in the second half it was always going to be difficult for Haringey and so it proved, it was 16 min before Smith in the Aylesbury goal even touched the ball, it was all Aylesbury pressure, but they were unable to get the ball in the net. The Haringey keeper was keeping them in the game although he was given the name “butter fingers”.
An attack and strike on goal had the ball rolling into the Haringey net, only for a defender to kick it over the bar with inches to spare.
With 68 min gone there was another appeal for a penalty when Price was brought down, the referee allowed play to continue as the ball broke lose and it was smashed against the crossbar, down onto the goal line and back out. Luck was just not there.
Then on 71 min after sustained pressure Henney was passed the ball in the area and he turned and slotted the ball into the net. 2 – 1.
The goal seemed to wake Haringey up and for the next ten min they came at Aylesbury, in fact Smith touched the ball twice.
With only minutes to go a Haringey attack was broken up and the clearance found Brennan out on the right. He moved the ball forward and as the oncoming keeper came out, lobed the ball over his head into the net for a nicely taken goal. 3 – 1.
The final whistle came and with it three points, but it was felt the score should have been more.
For some reason the physio, who’s name seems to be Dog was bundled by the team into the mud. Something about it was too cold to do a warm down.
As I walked out of the ground my last sight was of the grounds man Andy, standing in the centre circle shaking his head, looking at his lovely ripped up pitch.
I couldn’t stay for a drink, as I knew there was probably a fence sitting in the lounge waiting for me to put up.
Aylesbury FC v Haringey Borough
I didn’t have to work today, but all my great plans of laying in bed and doing nothing were shattered when the missus shook me awake to tell me the fence had blown down.
The rain had been belting down for the last two days and I wondered if the match would be on.
As I trundled out to the garden all wrapped up like an Eskimo, my darling little angel (I wish she was) called out. “And don’t think your going to that football place if you don’t fix the fence.”
Why did she have to call it that football place, or that place and not Aylesbury football club?
I banged a couple of six inch nails into the fence, that would hold it at least until I got out of the house and went and got ready for football.
Before going to Haywood Way I popped into my local for a pint.
Arthur, the old boy well into his nineties and as deaf as a post, was sitting at the bar nursing his glass.
“Want a drink Arthur,” I said
“No son, I can only have a half as it plays havoc with me Tinnitus.
“Oh ok, Isn’t Tinnitus noises in your ears Arthur?” I said
“Yes son, a droning all the time, all right I’ll have a scotch.”
“I get that every time I go home and the missus starts, a bloody droning in my ears,”
Arthur was busy licking some spilled scotch off the bar.
“I’m off to Aylesbury today” I said shouting so he could hear me; we are playing Haringey. I was sure I was safe with Haringey; he couldn’t know something about every place we played.
How wrong can a man be?
“Got done in the war they did”
Bloody hell, why didn’t I just say I was going shopping.
“A lot of bombs hit Haringey and they had more than their fair share of V2’s as well.
The North Middlesex Hospital was hit with six bombs at once.”
“I bet that blew a few people out of bed,” I said.
If he had had a Roka repellent at that moment he would have used it.
“Haringey play at White Hart Lane.” I said trying to confuse him. I thought he would think we were playing Tottenham Hotspur. Wrong again.
“Yes son they are the only team that play at White Hart Lane, Tottenham play at Park Lane.”
How did he know all this stuff?
“Arsenal used to play at White Hart Lane.”
“No they didn’t, they played at Highbury.”
“No son during the war Highbury ground was closed and Tottenham let them use theirs.”
“Well I never knew that Arthur”
“Yeah and something else happened in Haringey that they called the Tottenham Outrage.”
“Oh what was that then Arthur?”
“Two armed robbers of Russian extraction held up the wages clerk of the rubber works.”
“Was that the Durex factory?” I said and was laughing so much I spilt my beer, Arthur didn’t find anything funny.
“They made their getaway via Tottenham marshes and fled across the River Lee.”
“I don’t remember anything in the paper about that Arthur.”
“Oh yeah it was big news.”
This was good stuff for a change. “What happened?”
“They had guns and killed two people and wounded fourteen trying to make their escape. One of the ones killed was only thirteen.”
“Oh my God, I’m amazed I didn’t see this on TV or the papers. Go on.”
“On the opposite bank of the river they hijacked a Corporation tramcar, hotly pursued by the police on another tram.”
“What do you mean on a bleedin tramcar, we haven’t got tramcars?”
“We did have in those days.”
“When the bloody hell did this happen?
“1909”
“Oh for Christ sake”
“The hijacked tram was stopped, but the robbers continued their flight on foot. They were eventually cornered by the police and shot themselves rather than be captured.”
I wondered if I could be shot rather than listen any more.
“Got to go Arthur see you later.” I walked out of the pub in a daze.
I got to the club and went in for a beer, there were not a lot of people about, I didn’t blame them, it takes a special kind of nutter to come out in this weather.
I went into the ground, the rain had stopped but the wind was gusting very hard and I knew it could spoil the game.
I saw Ian the secretuary coughing his guts up on the steps, but he still had a fag on.
We came out in our famous red and black and Haringey were in yellow.
We started kicking into the strong wind and I thought if we could keep them out for the first half we will be ok.
It started well and Aylesbury was doing all the attacking and seemed the better side and then it happened. With just two minutes gone a Haringey cross from the left found the Aylesbury defence wanting. Mead was miles away from his man and he easily headed the ball past the stranded Smith into the net. 0 – 1.
Aylesbury did not panic and continued with the pressure. A minute later they should have scored but the ball was just pushed past the post by the keepers fingertips.
Haringey had their chances and on ten min it took a good save by Smith to keep them out.
Although they were playing against the strong wind, it could be seen that Aylesbury were the far better team. On the half hour a pass found Henney in the area and he rounded the keeper only to have his legs taken away from him.
Henney smashed the resulting penalty into the net. 1 – 1.
Aylesbury kept up the pressure and Henney was unlucky not to score just before half time when he turned in the area and shot just wide.
The half time whistle came and I rushed into the club for a nice cold beer, I needed it, I was frozen.
With Aylesbury kicking with the wind in the second half it was always going to be difficult for Haringey and so it proved, it was 16 min before Smith in the Aylesbury goal even touched the ball, it was all Aylesbury pressure, but they were unable to get the ball in the net. The Haringey keeper was keeping them in the game although he was given the name “butter fingers”.
An attack and strike on goal had the ball rolling into the Haringey net, only for a defender to kick it over the bar with inches to spare.
With 68 min gone there was another appeal for a penalty when Price was brought down, the referee allowed play to continue as the ball broke lose and it was smashed against the crossbar, down onto the goal line and back out. Luck was just not there.
Then on 71 min after sustained pressure Henney was passed the ball in the area and he turned and slotted the ball into the net. 2 – 1.
The goal seemed to wake Haringey up and for the next ten min they came at Aylesbury, in fact Smith touched the ball twice.
With only minutes to go a Haringey attack was broken up and the clearance found Brennan out on the right. He moved the ball forward and as the oncoming keeper came out, lobed the ball over his head into the net for a nicely taken goal. 3 – 1.
The final whistle came and with it three points, but it was felt the score should have been more.
For some reason the physio, who’s name seems to be Dog was bundled by the team into the mud. Something about it was too cold to do a warm down.
As I walked out of the ground my last sight was of the grounds man Andy, standing in the centre circle shaking his head, looking at his lovely ripped up pitch.
I couldn’t stay for a drink, as I knew there was probably a fence sitting in the lounge waiting for me to put up.
